Alaskan Sign

The Pirate

A pirate walked into a bar and the bartender said, "Hey, I haven't seen you in a while. What happened? You look terrible."

"What do you mean?" said the pirate, "I feel fine."

"What about the wooden leg? You didn't have that before."

"Well," said the pirate, "We were in a battle, and I got hit with a cannon ball, but I'm fine now."

The bartender replied, "Well, OK, but what about that hook? What happened to your hand?"

The pirate explained, "We were in another battle. I boarded a ship and got into a sword fight. My hand was cut off. I got fitted with a hook but I'm fine, really."

"What about that eye patch?"

"Oh," said the pirate, "One day we were at sea and a flock of birds flew over. I looked up, and one of them shit in my eye."

"You're kidding," said the bartender. "You couldn't lose an eye just from bird shit."

The pirate nodded and replied, "It was my first day with the hook."

Is Now Revealed ...

The Pentagon has finally announced the identity of the man responsible for giving the information that finally led to the location of bin Laden. While they have not supplied the informant's name, they have released a photo ...

Glad That's Cleared Up ...

It's finally been cleared up ... now we know the team that took out bin Laden ...









Thanks, Mr President for setting us straight.