March 29, 2009
March 15, 2009
Letter From the Boss
As the CEO of this organization, I have resigned myself to the fact that Barrack Obama is our President and that our taxes and government fees will increase in a BIG way.
To compensate for these increases, our prices would have to increase by about 10%. Since we believe we cannot increase our prices right now due to the dismal state of the economy, we will have to lay off six of our employees instead. This has really been bothering me, since I believe we are family here and I didn't know how to choose who would have to go.
So, this is what I did. I walked through our parking lot and found six 'Obama bumper stickers on our employees' cars and have decided these folks will be the ones to be let go. I can't think of a more fair way to approach this problem. They voted for change, I will give it to them.
I will see the rest of you at the annual company picnic!
To compensate for these increases, our prices would have to increase by about 10%. Since we believe we cannot increase our prices right now due to the dismal state of the economy, we will have to lay off six of our employees instead. This has really been bothering me, since I believe we are family here and I didn't know how to choose who would have to go.
So, this is what I did. I walked through our parking lot and found six 'Obama bumper stickers on our employees' cars and have decided these folks will be the ones to be let go. I can't think of a more fair way to approach this problem. They voted for change, I will give it to them.
I will see the rest of you at the annual company picnic!
March 12, 2009
March 01, 2009
The French
Going to war without the French is like going hunting without an accordion.
The French are to warfare what the British are to cooking.
Q: Why do French naval ships have glass bottoms?
A: To see all their other ships.
Q: How many Frenchmen does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: One, Chirac. He stands still and Europe revolves around him.
Q: Why do the French call their fighter the "Mirage"?
A: Because it's never seen in a combat zone.
Q: What's the difference between a dead skunk and a dead Frenchman In the middle of the road?
A: There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
Q: What's the best place to hide your money?
A: Under a Frenchman's soap.
Q: How do you get a Frenchman out of a bath tub?
A: Throw in a bar of soap.
Q: What do you get if you see a Frenchman up to his neck in sand?
A: More sand.
Q: What do you call 100,000 Frenchmen with their hands up?
A: The Army.
Q: What did the Mayor of Paris say to the German Army as they entered?
A: Table for one hundred thousand, sir?
Q: What do French recruits learn in basic training?
A: How to surrender in 17 different languages.
Q: Why did the French start using garlic?
A: To improve their breath.
The French are to warfare what the British are to cooking.
Q: Why do French naval ships have glass bottoms?
A: To see all their other ships.
Q: How many Frenchmen does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: One, Chirac. He stands still and Europe revolves around him.
Q: Why do the French call their fighter the "Mirage"?
A: Because it's never seen in a combat zone.
Q: What's the difference between a dead skunk and a dead Frenchman In the middle of the road?
A: There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
Q: What's the best place to hide your money?
A: Under a Frenchman's soap.
Q: How do you get a Frenchman out of a bath tub?
A: Throw in a bar of soap.
Q: What do you get if you see a Frenchman up to his neck in sand?
A: More sand.
Q: What do you call 100,000 Frenchmen with their hands up?
A: The Army.
Q: What did the Mayor of Paris say to the German Army as they entered?
A: Table for one hundred thousand, sir?
Q: What do French recruits learn in basic training?
A: How to surrender in 17 different languages.
Q: Why did the French start using garlic?
A: To improve their breath.
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