This One Has to be Better Than the Last One!
December 31, 2020
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What Motivates Men #1
We'd like to thank the producers of www.motivateusnot.com
for their excellent humor
December 15, 2020
How Do You Say...
If you can’t think of a word, say, “I forgot the English word for it.”
That way, people will think you’re bilingual instead of an idiot.
The Newlywed Understanding
A newlywed couple had only been married for two weeks. The husband,
although very much in love, couldn't wait to go out on the town and
party with his old buddies, so he said to his new wife, 'Honey, I'll be
right back.”
“Where are you going, coochy cooh?” asked the wife.
“I'm going to the bar, pretty face. I'm going to have a beer.”
The wife said, 'You want a beer, my love?' She opened the door to the
refrigerator and showed him 25 different kinds of beer brands from ten
different countries: Germany, Holland, Japan, India, etc.
The husband didn't know what to do, and the only thing that he could
think of saying was, “Yes, lollypop... but at the bar... you know...
they have frozen glasses.”
He didn't get to finish the sentence because the wife interrupted him by saying, “You want a frozen glass, puppy face?”
She took a giant beer mug out of the freezer, so frozen that she was getting chills just holding it.
The husband, looking a bit pale, said, “Yes, tootsie roll, but at the
Bar, they have those hors d'oeuvres that are really delicious. I won't
be long, and I'll be right back. I promise. OK?”
“You want hors d'oeuvres, poochie pooh?” She opened the oven and took
out five dishes of different hors d'oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs in
blankets, mushroom caps, pork strips, etc.
“But my sweet honey. At the bar... You know... there's swearing, dirty words and all that.”
“You want dirty words, Dickhead? Drink your fucking beer in your Goddamn
frozen mug and eat your motherfucking snacks, because you are married
now, and you aren't fucking going anywhere! Got it, Asshole?”
And… they lived happily ever after.
December 10, 2020
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