January 31, 2021
January 30, 2021
January 29, 2021
January 28, 2021
January 27, 2021
January 26, 2021
January 24, 2021
January 23, 2021
January 22, 2021
Yep... That's About It
If 2020 was a math word-problem:
If you’re going down a river at 2 MPH and your canoe loses a wheel, how much pancake mix would you need to re-shingle your roof?
January 21, 2021
January 20, 2021
January 19, 2021
We Want to Adopt
A husband and wife who work for the circus go to an adoption agency.
Social workers there raise doubts about their suitability.
The couple produces photos of their 50-foot motor home, clean and well maintained and equipped with a beautiful nursery.
The social workers raise concerns about the education a child would receive while in the couple's care.
"We've arranged for a full-time tutor who will teach the child all the
usual subjects along with French, Mandarin, and computer skills."
Then the social workers express concern about a child being raised in a circus environment.
"Our nanny is a certified expert in pediatric care, welfare, and diet."
The social workers are finally satisfied. They ask, "What age child are you hoping to adopt?"
Their reply… "It doesn't really matter, as long as the kid fits in the cannon."
January 18, 2021
January 16, 2021
January 15, 2021
January 14, 2021
January 13, 2021
January 12, 2021
January 11, 2021
January 07, 2021
January 06, 2021
January 05, 2021
Off To England
Conjoined
twins walk into a bar in Calgary and park themselves on a bar stool. One
of them says to the bartender, "Don't mind us; we're joined at the hip.
I'm John, he's Jim. Two Molson Canadian beers, draft please."
The
bartender, feeling slightly awkward, tries to make polite conversation
while pouring the beers. "Been on vacation yet, fellas?"
"Off
to England next month," says John. "We go to England every year, rent
a car, and drive for miles and miles, don't we, Jim?"
Jim nods.
"Ah, England!" says the bartender. "Wonderful country -- the history, the culture, and especially the beer"
"Nah,
we don't like that British warm beer," says John. "Hamburgers and
Molson's cold beer, that's for us, eh Jim? And we don’t especially like
the English people, they're a bit arrogant and rude."
"So why keep going to England?" asks the bartender.
"Gives Jim a chance to drive" John replies.
January 04, 2021
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)