Isn't It True?

Gun Control

Troubled Doctor

Doctor Dave had sex with one of his patients and felt guilty all day long.  No matter how much he tried to forget about it, he just couldn't.  The guilt and sense of betrayal were overwhelming.

But every once in a while he'd hear an internal, reassuring voice in his head that said, “Dave, don't worry about it.  You aren't the first medical practitioner to have sex with one of their patients and you won't be the last.  And you're single. Just let it go, Dave.”

But, invariably another voice in his head would bring him back to reality, whispering, “Dave …You're a veterinarian, you sick bastard.”

A Problem With Squirrels

The first time we published this story there were three churches ... Now we have four churches and a synagogue.  Everything gets updated.

There were four churches and a synagogue in a small town: a Presbyterian church, a Baptist church, a Methodist church, a Catholic church and a Jewish synagogue.  Each church and the synagogue had a problem with squirrels.

The Presbyterian Church called a meeting to decide what to do about their squirrels.  After much prayer and consideration they determined the squirrels were predestined to be there and they shouldn’t interfere with God’s divine will.

At the Baptist church the squirrels had taken an interest in the baptistery.  The deacons met and decided to put a water slide on the baptistery and let the squirrels drown themselves.  The squirrels liked the slide and, unfortunately, knew instinctively how to swim so twice as many squirrels showed up the following week.

The Methodist church decided that they were not in a position to harm any of God’s creatures.  So, they humanely trapped their squirrels and set them free near the Baptist Church.  Two weeks later the squirrels were back when the Baptists took down the water slide.

But the Catholic Church came up with a very creative strategy.  They baptized all the squirrels and consecrated them as members of the church.  Now they only see them on Christmas and Easter.

Not much was heard from the Jewish synagogue.  They took one squirrel and circumcised him.  They haven’t seen a squirrel since.

Survey Says ...

A recent study found that women who carry a little extra weight live longer than the men who mention it.

A Tax Lesson

Be a responsible parent.  Teach your children about taxes.

Amen ...

From your lips to God's ears ...

My Dream ...

If only ...

Reagan's Last Words ...

I don't know whether or not you watched the memorial service for President Ronald Reagan, but if you did, you probably noticed that Bill and Hillary were both dozing off.

​

​

President Reagan, who never missed a chance for a good one-liner, raised his head out of his casket and said ...

I see the Clintons are finally sleeping together!