October 26, 2008

Perfect Frank

A man walks out to the street and catches a taxi just going by. He gets into the taxi, and the cabbie says, "Perfect timing. You're just like Frank."

The passenger asks, "Who?"

The cabbie says, "Frank Feldman. He's a guy who did everything right all the time. Like my coming along when you needed a cab, things happened like that to Frank Feldman every single time."

The passenger said, "There are always a few clouds over everybody."

The cabbie replied, "Not Frank Feldman. He was a terrific athlete. He could have won the Grand Slam at tennis. He could golf with the pros. He sang like an opera baritone and danced like a Broadway star and you should have heard him play the piano. He was an amazing guy."

The passenger said, "Sounds like he was something really special."

The cabbie replied, "There's more... He had a memory like a computer. He remembered everybody's birthday. He knew all about wine, which foods to order and which fork to eat them with. He could fix anything. Not like me. I change a fuse, and the whole street blacks out. But, Frank Feldman, he could do everything right."

The passenger being quite impressed said, "Wow, some guy then, that Frank."

The cabbie siad, "He always knew the quickest way to go in traffic and avoid traffic jams. Not like me, I always seem to get stuck in them. But Frank never made a mistake, and he really knew how to treat a woman and make her feel good. He would never answer her back even if she was in the wrong; and his clothing was always immaculate, shoes highly polished too. He was the perfect man! He never made a mistake. No one could ever measure up to Frank Feldman.

The passenger, being quite impressed said, "An amazing fellow. How did you meet him?"

The cabbie replied, "Well, I never actually met Frank. He died and I married his widow."

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