- Why do men become smarter during sex?
Because they are plugged into a genius. - Why does it take 1 million sperm to fertilize 1 egg?
They won't stop for directions. - Why did God put man on earth?
Because a vibrator can't mow the lawn. - Why don't woman have men's brains?
Because they don't have penises to put them in. - What do electric trains and breasts have in common?
They're intended for children, but it's the men who usually end up playing with them. - Why do men snore when they lay on their back?
Because their balls fall over their assholes and they vapor lock. - Why do men masturbate?
It's sex with someone they love. - Why were men given larger brains then dogs?
So they won't hump women's legs at cocktail parties. - Why did God make men before women?
You need a rough draft before you have a final copy. - Why is a man's pee yellow and his sperm white?
So he can tell if he is coming or going. - How many men does it take to put the toilet seat down?
Nobody knows, it hasn't happened yet. - Why do women rub their eyes in the morning upon waking up?
Because they do not have balls to scratch.
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