October 21, 2007

A bit of Male Bashing

  • Why do men become smarter during sex?
    Because they are plugged into a genius.
  • Why does it take 1 million sperm to fertilize 1 egg?
    They won't stop for directions.
  • Why did God put man on earth?
    Because a vibrator can't mow the lawn.
  • Why don't woman have men's brains?
    Because they don't have penises to put them in.
  • What do electric trains and breasts have in common?
    They're intended for children, but it's the men who usually end up playing with them.
  • Why do men snore when they lay on their back?
    Because their balls fall over their assholes and they vapor lock.
  • Why do men masturbate?
    It's sex with someone they love.
  • Why were men given larger brains then dogs?
    So they won't hump women's legs at cocktail parties.
  • Why did God make men before women?
    You need a rough draft before you have a final copy.
  • Why is a man's pee yellow and his sperm white?
    So he can tell if he is coming or going.
  • How many men does it take to put the toilet seat down?
    Nobody knows, it hasn't happened yet.
  • Why do women rub their eyes in the morning upon waking up?
    Because they do not have balls to scratch.

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