Twas the night before impeachment

Twas the night before impeachment and all through the House

All the Congress was stirring, even Conyers, the louse.

The Articles were hung on the Capitol with care

In hope that old Bubba would be trapped in his lair.

Republicans were warmly nestled with Feds

While visions of perjury danced in their heads

And Barr with his rhetoric, and Hyde with his trap

had just settled in for an afternoon nap.

When out in the Gulf there arose such a clatter

They tuned CNN to see what's the matter

And what to their wondering eyes should appear

but Tomahak missiles cruising like reindeer

With a presidential address, so lively and quick,

we knew in a moment it must be Ol' Slick

More loyal than beagles, his supporters they came

And he whistled and shouted and called them by name

Now Conyers, Now Gephard, forget about the Vixen!

On Barney! On Maxine! Hey I'm no Nixon!

From Capitol Hill to the Washington Mall

Now dash away, Poll away, Fool them all

And then the Republicans heard on the roof

the prancing and pawing of each little goof

As they scratched their head and were turning around

Resilient ol' Slick polled another rebound.

No longer was he eating his big humble pie

While assaulting Saddam with bombs from the sky

A bundle of weapons he had flung at Iraq,

It looked like again Slick Willie was back.

His eyes how they twinkled, his dimples so merry

he searched for an intern - he wanted a cherry.

His droll big mouth was all drawn in a grin

he knew all at once he had fooled them again

The stump of a stogie he held in his teeth,

The smoke had encircled his head like a wreath

He had a broad face like an old lumberjack's

and a big round belly from eating Big Macs

He was chubby and plump a right jolly old elf

the Republicans wept in spite of themselves

A wink of his eye and a twist of his head

soon gave them to know they had something to dread

He spoke the right words and went straight to his work

Ignoring the fact that some think him a jerk

And shaking his finger, and thumbing his nose

by "Wagging the Dog" up the polls he rose

He turned to his spinmeisters and gave them a whistle

They cheered Slick Willie as he launched one more missile

They heard him exclaim, with Impeachment out of sight

"Happy Ramadan to all, and Thank God for this fight"