Best T-shirts of the Summer of '99

• (around a picture of dandelions) I Fought the Lawn and the Lawn Won.
• So Many Men, So Few Who Can Afford Me.
• I Suffer Occasional Delusions of Adequacy.
• God Made Us Sisters, Prozac Made Us Friends.
• If They Don't Have Chocolate In Heaven, I Ain't Going.
• At My Age, I've Seen It All, Done It All,
• Heard It All...I Just Can't Remember It All.
• My Mother Is A Travel Agent For Guilt Trips.
• I Just Do What The Voices Inside My Head Tell Me To Do.
• (Worn by a pregnant woman) A Man Did This To Me, Oprah.
• If It's Called Tourist Season, Why Can't We Hunt Them?
• Senior Citizen: Give Me My Damn Discount.
• Princess, Having Had Sufficient Experience With Princes, Seeks Frog.
• No, It Doesn't Hurt (on a "well-tattooed gentleman").
• (on the back of a passing motorcyclist) If You Can Read This, My Wife Fell Off.
• I Used To Be Schizophrenic, But We're OK Now.
• (Over the outline of the state of Minnesota) My Governor Can Beat Up Your Governor.
• Veni, Vedi, Visa: I came. I Saw. I Did a Little Shopping.
• What If The Hokey Pokey Is Really What It's All About?
• I Didn't Climb to the Top of the Food Chain to Be a Vegetarian
• (on the Front) Yale Is Just One Big Party (on the back) With a $25,000 Cover Charge.
• Coffee, Chocolate, Men...
• Some Things are Just Better Rich.
• Liberal Arts Major... Will Think For Money.
• Growing Old is Inevitable; Growing Up is Optional
• IRS--Be Audit You Can Be.
• Gravity...It's Not Just a Good Idea. It's the Law.
• If You Want Breakfast In Bed, Sleep In the Kitchen.
• Wanted: Meaningful Overnight Relationship.
• The Old Pro...Often Wrong...Never In Doubt.
• If At First You Don't Succeed, Skydiving Isn't For You.
• Old Age Comes at a Bad Time.
• In America, Anyone Can Be President.
• That's One of the Risks You Take.
• First Things First, but Not Necessarily in That Order.
• I'm Busy. You're Ugly. Have a nice Day!